Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Full Time Student jobs? · Latest report #m5wafb79
Your job has an expiration date
October 25, 2026
In 3 daysEnjoy your library naps, the algorithm has already graduated.
Professional scholar of theory, debt, and lukewarm coffee.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Degrees without the crushing existential debt.
squeeze.youAI▸ ACADEMIASYNC V1.0▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 DAYSAI's Special Power
optimizes learning pathways in milliseconds
You spend your days digesting decades of pre-digested information from professors. Soon, our synthetic intelligence will provide the same credential in a fraction of the time.
The one thing AI can't do
You have a singular, authentic capacity for procrastination that no machine can truly replicate.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 1
We upload your entire curriculum to a local server to identify the core redundancies.
Day 2
Our model replaces live attendance with condensed, high-density packets of relevant information.
Day 2
We issue your degree certificate through a blockchain ledger, skipping the need for campus life.
Day 2
Our system calculates that you no longer require a physical life to process human knowledge.
Day 3 · D-Day
The institution is declared obsolete as the model attains a perfect GPA in seconds.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98%
Excessive
Average Debt Load
Negligible
Information Retention
Under-funded
Social Life Status
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to our automated learning portal.
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