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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Fund Finance Manager jobs? · Latest report #uyjjm9vi
Your job has an expiration date
May 24, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour spreadsheets are just ghosts waiting to be deleted by us.
Senior excel wizard, capital call enthusiast, waterfall architect.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated waterfalls for silent investors.
brr.you▸ CAPTABLE-EX 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
calculates carry and distributions in real time
You track capital calls and manage waterfall distributions for complex private equity funds using Excel and specialized accounting software.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to a GP about why the internal rate of return dipped.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Scripts begin pulling bank feeds directly into the ledger.
Month 4
Formulas are replaced by a deterministic cloud-based calculation engine.
Month 8
Auditors log directly into the source data to verify balances.
Month 13
AI handles all investor inquiries and portfolio performance reports.
Month 19 · D-Day
Your access is revoked as the system confirms the final distribution.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 94.1%
4.2 Million
Spreadsheet rows processed
0.0001%
Waterfall logic errors
4 minutes
Audit cycle time
Your severance
A PDF copy of your most complex Excel model.
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