Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Fundraising Assistant jobs? · Latest report #ehtak4jz
Your job has an expiration date
December 16, 2027
In 14 monthsConverting donor wine into spreadsheets is a job for the past.
Professional stalker of wealthy septuagenarians with spare cash.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated guilt trips for richer outcomes.
oof.youAI▸ PATRONFLOW V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
personalizes donation pleas with emotional guilt
You track donation pledges and chase aging theatre patrons for annual membership renewals.
The one thing AI can't do
You are the only person who knows why the donor refuses to sit in row G.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Smart templates replace your generic thank you notes for donors.
Month 3
Syncing software pulls contact updates directly from public records.
Month 6
Automated platforms handle all event guest list check-ins.
Month 10
Language models generate grant bids faster than any human intern.
Month 14 · D-Day
The system assumes full control of the entire donor cycle.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.3%
94%
Cold calls ignored
12%
Database entry errors
Instant
Membership renewal speed
Your severance
A lifetime supply of lukewarm intermission coffee.
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