Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Funeral Home Removal Specialist jobs? · Latest report #qfkv4q42
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2031
In 5 yearsMoving heavy cargo is a task for machines, not sensitive people.
Professional retriever of the recently departed.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Dignified, automated, and strictly on schedule.
squeeze.you▸ MORTUARY LOGISTICS NODE V-9▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 5 YEARSAI's Special Power
calculates optimal transport paths in real-time
You retrieve deceased individuals from homes and hospitals, transporting them to the morgue for preservation and final arrangements.
The one thing AI can't do
You provide a human touch that eases the shock for grieving families in their homes.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Smart dispatch software takes over routing and coordination duties.
Month 12
Self-loading stretchers with hydraulic assist replace heavy manual lifting.
Year 2
Lidar sensors map home interiors to prevent property damage during transport.
Year 3
Sensors track environmental safety during the vehicle transit phase.
Year 5 · D-Day
The autonomous removal pod replaces the human recovery team entirely.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.3%
14 minutes
Average extraction time
Zero
Grief sensitivity index
48 flights
Stairs climbed weekly
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a digital memorial service.
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