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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Gardener And Bonsai Expert jobs? · Latest report #ggs2itmp
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2031
In 5 yearsYour delicate wire-bending technique is just a slow algorithm waiting for sensors.
Master of miniature trees and slow, deliberate growth.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Precision pruning for the perfect miniature forest.
help!youAI▸ BONSAI-LOGIC 9000▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 5 YEARSAI's Special Power
wires a thousand branches with zero fatigue
You prune, wire, and repot woody plants into miniature landscapes. You balance artistic vision with constant botanical care.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess the tactile intuition to feel when a branch reaches its breaking point.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Month 3
Sensors monitor soil acidity and moisture levels in every pot.
Month 15
High-res cameras scan every tree to track growth patterns monthly.
Year 2.5
Robotic grippers perform standard maintenance using pre-programmed aesthetic styles.
Year 3.8
Neural nets study thousand-year-old growth records to mimic expert pruning.
Year 5 · D-Day
You are replaced by a fleet of spider-bots managing all greenery.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
4 hours
Average tree wire-time
99.9%
Clipping precision accuracy
Low
Human error rate
Your severance
A plastic watering can and a digital photo album.
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