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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Gift Shop Associate jobs? · Latest report #3fkfrmwp
Your job has an expiration date
May 19, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsProfessional dust-collector for overpriced trinkets that nobody actually needs to own.
Professional dust-collector and master of the barcode scanner.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Frictionless commerce for the mindless consumer.
help!youAI▸ KIOSK-O-MATIC 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
upsells keychains to captive tourists
You spend your shift tagging inventory, rearranging display shelves, and answering repetitive tourist questions about item prices. It is essentially a warehouse job with more glitter.
The one thing AI can't do
You can politely pretend that the plastic snow globe is a high-quality artisanal heirloom.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
RFID sensors replace your manual barcode scanning and inventory tracking.
Month 5
Vision systems monitor shelf emptiness and alert a simple conveyor replenishment arm.
Month 13
The cash register is replaced by a payment pod that ignores customer small talk.
Year 1.9
Pneumatic arms take over the delicate task of dusting inventory and straightening displays.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
The shop is converted into a fully autonomous vending room, rendering human presence obsolete.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.2%
12/hour
Average customer eye-roll frequency
4% accurate
Dusting efficiency
4000 SKU
Pointless inventory items
Your severance
One complimentary keychain and a very polite dismissal letter.
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