Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Graduate Student jobs? · Latest report #vj2ewm5g
Your job has an expiration date
April 21, 2027
In 6 monthsEnjoy your regression while an LLM hallucinates a better p-value.
Running regressions and hiding from actual theoretical contributions.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Statistically superior to your thesis advisor.
split.you▸ QUANTSCRIPT PRO V4▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
automates thesis completion while you sleep
You spend days running regressions on messy datasets and building slides to justify your existence to professors.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still look appropriately confused when your advisor questions your methodology.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 13
An agent automatically scrapes and cleans the messy CSV files.
Week 6
The AI runs thousands of regressions to find the best fit.
Week 11
Vision models build the slide decks for your department presentations.
Month 4
Automated tools write polite, critical comments on your research drafts.
Month 6 · D-Day
The department replaces your desk with a GPU cluster.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.4%
0.02 seconds
Regression runtime
Way too much
Coffee consumed
99.9%
Meaningless p-values
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to our dataset scraping API.
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