Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Grassroots Soccer Coach jobs? · Latest report #quzpsjwi
Your job has an expiration date
December 1, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthYou teach kids to kick, but software teaches them to win.
Master of herding cats on a grassy rectangle.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Tactical perfection without the halftime oranges.




help!youAI▸ PITCHBOT PRO 3.0▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
delivers pre-recorded pep talks with perfect timing
You spend weekends yelling at children to spread out and managing parents who think they're pro scouts.
The one thing AI can't do
You can tell when a kid is actually sick or just faking to skip practice.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 7
Apps replace your clunky tactical whiteboard with instant team simulations.
Month 8
Smart vests track every child's movement and output automatically.
Month 20
Vision-guided units remove the need for your biased judgment calls.
Year 2.9
Projection systems on the pitch guide players without verbal coaching.
Year 4 · D-Day
Parental interface portals now fully handle the schedule and snacks.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95%
4 per game
Average Parent Tantrums
12
Whistle Blows Per Minute
14 annually
Unaccounted Soccer Balls
Your severance
One oversized trophy and a bag of deflated balls.
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