Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Gravedigger and Funeral Celebrant jobs? · Latest report #6rgub6wh
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2031
In 5 yearsSix feet under is exactly where your career prospects belong.
Expert in dirt moving and final farewell scripting.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Precision digging and scripted solace for all.
bzzt.youAI▸ INTERBOT CEMETERY SYSTEM V9▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 5 YEARSAI's Special Power
delivers eulogies with perfect calibrated empathy
You manually excavate burial plots and lead somber funeral ceremonies for grieving families.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess the tact to handle human grief without sounding like a broken speaker.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Sensors map underground obstacles to bypass tree roots and pipes.
Month 10
Gantry-mounted drills dig perfectly uniform pits while you watch.
Year 1.9
A high-fidelity screen delivers personalized eulogies with zero stuttering.
Year 3.3
Hydraulic platforms replace the awkward rope-lowering ritual.
Year 5 · D-Day
The machine takes over the entire process from sod to stone.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
99.9 percent
Average depth accuracy
0 milliseconds
Emotional script delay
12 units
Plots dug per hour
Your severance
A shovel with a commemorative sticker on the handle.
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