Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Growth Equity Investor jobs? · Latest report #k48hnyf6
Your job has an expiration date
May 24, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYou analyze deal flow spreadsheets until your vision blurs into grey noise.
Loves EBITDA more than actual human beings.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Data-driven capital allocation without the lunch meetings.





split.youAI▸ CAPTABLE-BOT X1▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
filters 500 pitch decks in three seconds
You spend your days reviewing pitch decks and calculating exit multiples for small, boring companies.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the exact moment a founder is lying about their CAC.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Software scrapes lead lists and sends hyper-personalized outreach at scale.
Month 4
AI vision models extract financial projections from decks instantly.
Month 9
Bots crawl company data rooms to flag accounting discrepancies.
Month 13
Generative models draft your investment memos before you finish coffee.
Month 19 · D-Day
Algorithms finalize capital allocation without your expensive input.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.6%
4,000 yearly
Cold emails sent
35 average
Slides in deck
under 2%
Deals actually closed
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a premium coffee delivery service.
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