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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Growth Strategy Analyst jobs? · Latest report #9kyyfvxs
Your job has an expiration date
May 25, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour spreadsheets are just elaborate tombstone carvings for dead business ideas.
Professional powerpoint warrior and pivot table enthusiast.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Turning gut feelings into cold, hard profits.
oof.youAI▸ STRATEGYBOT V9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
automates quarterly slide decks overnight
You spend all day crunching market data in Excel and building slide decks to justify budget burning.
The one thing AI can't do
You can uniquely detect when the boardroom is lying to themselves about the churn rate.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors pull live CRM data directly into our central brain.
Month 4
Smart templates replace your manual deck building process entirely.
Month 8
Our algorithms identify growth levers without human input or bias.
Month 13
Leadership starts preferring the bot's cold, logical growth charts.
Month 19 · D-Day
The spreadsheet is deleted; the analyst role officially expires.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.3%
12 per week
Pivot frequency
4,000 yearly
Vague slide deck pages
Excessive
Coffee-to-data ratio
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a generic charting tool.
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