Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Head Of Client Lifecycle jobs? · Latest report #d9vzhcrd
Your job has an expiration date
May 25, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour spreadsheets and human handshakes are just a slow API call.
Professional cat-herder for high-stakes bond traders
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Onboarding without the emotional baggage.










glub.youAI▸ LIFECYCLE-SYNC 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
automates onboarding pipelines at lightning speed
You manage client onboarding, user access, and service touchpoints. Your day is endless email chains and manual data entry.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to a client about why their access is delayed.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Our software scans your inbox and logs your email habits.
Month 4
Smart agents now handle all user permissions and access rights.
Month 8
Self-service bots replace your manual document chasing and verification.
Month 13
AI handles client inquiries with pre-programmed empathetic responses.
Month 19 · D-Day
You are invited to a final, entirely automated exit interview.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.5%
4,200 rows
Spreadsheet rows per day
99 percent
Emails that could be automated
12 weekly
Meetings about onboarding processes
Your severance
One free trial month of our automated replacement software.
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