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Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Head of ESG jobs? · Latest report #ygy9h4vq
Your job has an expiration date
December 7, 2027
In 13 monthsTurning your vague corporate virtue signaling into a silent data set.
Professional weaver of corporate buzzword tapestries.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
The end of performative corporate ethics.
stretchy.youAI▸ VIRTUEAUDIT-X9▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 13 MONTHSAI's Special Power
generates perfect net-zero reports in milliseconds
You track carbon footprints and write long sustainability reports. Then you pitch these metrics to skeptical board members.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still look a board member in the eye while lying convincingly.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Sensors scrape utility bills and fuel logs directly from buildings.
Month 4
AI models generate standard ESG report templates without human help.
Month 8
A screen presents the data, skipping the emotional sales pitch.
Month 12
Smart contracts automatically cut budgets for high-carbon projects.
Month 13 · D-Day
The entire department is consolidated into a single background process.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.6%
42
Acronyms invented per quarter
89%
Time spent in meetings
99%
Reports that remain unread
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to locally sourced, ethically grown kale.
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