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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace High Net Worth Individual jobs? · Latest report #6sqhazbd
Your job has an expiration date
April 20, 2027
In 6 monthsAccumulating capital is easy, but spending it without irony is impossible.
Professional gatekeeper of inherited capital and tax loopholes.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated greed, zero ego, infinite compounding.
squeeze.you▸ CAPITAI WEALTH ENGINE 9▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
liquidates your entire estate while you sleep
You optimize tax shelters and manage asset allocation for generational wealth preservation. Your primary output is capital gains and extreme lifestyle maintenance.
The one thing AI can't do
You are actually capable of feeling genuine guilt about your portfolio's impact on reality.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Our algorithms ingest your entire asset history to predict your next irrational investment move.
Week 9
AI-driven agents replace your assistants, automating the scheduling of your meaningless charity galas.
Month 3
A sentiment analysis model generates your public persona to ensure you stay appropriately out-of-touch.
Month 5
The system automatically reallocates your funds to offshore entities faster than any human accountant.
Month 6 · D-Day
You are successfully rendered as a high-frequency trading variable in our primary cloud instance.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97%
99.9%
Asset churn rate
100%
Tax evasion efficiency
0.01%
Empathy simulation
Your severance
A single digital NFT of a crying emoji.
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