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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Hockey Broadcaster and Manager jobs? · Latest report #eadtmiq9
Your job has an expiration date
July 23, 2028
In 1 year, 9 monthsTranslating puck movement into human noise is a bottleneck for efficiency.
Professional loud-talker and email triage specialist.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Real-time, error-free play-by-play synthesis.
split.youAI▸ PUCKPULSE AI-BROADCASTER 4.0▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 9 MONTHSAI's Special Power
delivers hype commentary with zero bias
You broadcast live play-by-play commentary while juggling internal hockey communications and media logistics. Your role consists of interpreting real-time action for a distracted, beer-fueled audience.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess the irrational charisma to make a scoreless second period feel like history.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
AI begins drafting and routing your routine hockey communications and PR responses.
Month 5
Software captures your broadcast cadence to train a real-time, high-energy commentary model.
Month 10
Vision sensors map the ice to provide precise play-by-play data to the broadcast engine.
Month 15
An automated system handles all locker room media scheduling and credential distribution without human oversight.
Month 21 · D-Day
The broadcast booth is officially repurposed as a server closet for the AI's compute rack.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97%
4.2
Average words per second
91%
Accuracy rate for rapid calls
8400
Communications emails sent annually
Your severance
One signed hockey puck and a LinkedIn redirect.
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