Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Human Cannonball jobs? · Latest report #nvffgert
Your job has an expiration date
September 21, 2028
In 1 year, 11 monthsAiming for a landing zone that never misses.
High-velocity performer with a tragic lack of aerodynamics.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Physics without the squishy human cargo.
split.youAI▸ PROJECTILEPROPULSION-9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
launches a dummy at supersonic speeds
Performing high-speed aerial flight via pneumatic force while wearing a glittery unitard.
The one thing AI can't do
You are the only one who truly knows the terror of the countdown.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Month 3
High-speed cameras map the perfect flight arc for future tests.
Month 8
A weighted mannequin replaces you for initial safety testing.
Month 13
Robotic valves ensure consistent pressure every single time.
Month 18
Motorized winches adjust the landing area in real-time.
Year 1.9 · D-Day
Your unitard is retired as the machine takes the final flight.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.1%
Infinite
G-force tolerance
Millimeter
Landing precision
Zero
Glitter consumption
Your severance
One free pass to the county fair.
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