Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Indie Barista jobs? · Latest report #myx29g9f
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2030
In 4 yearsYour latte art will soon be replaced by a perfectly calibrated nozzle.
Professional bean-whisperer with a flair for foam.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Consistent caffeine without the attitude.
squeeze.you▸ BARISTABOT PRO-V2▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARSAI's Special Power
dispenses perfectly steamed foam on demand
You grind beans and froth milk for caffeine-dependent locals. You try to look cool while cleaning the steam wand.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still read the room and pour a heart even when tired.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors adjust grind size automatically based on ambient air readings.
Month 10
Robotic arms hold the pitcher at the perfect angle for foam.
Year 1.9
Your manual queue is replaced by a direct machine-to-customer prompt.
Year 3
Self-purging steam systems eliminate the need for human wipe-downs.
Year 4 · D-Day
You are invited to leave as the unit finishes calibration.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92.9%
0.01 percent
Average extraction error
Zero ml
Milk wastage
Instant silence
Small talk latency
Your severance
A lifetime supply of instant coffee crystals.
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