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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Intimate Masseuse jobs? · Latest report #24j5n92r
Your job has an expiration date
December 9, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthHuman hands are expensive luxury items you can now download.
Professional kneader of overstressed elites and their heavy bank accounts.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Firm pressure, zero judgement, infinite battery life.
stretchy.youAI▸ SOFTTOUCH PRO 9▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
delivers precise pressure points without getting tired
You provide manual muscle relief and lymphatic drainage for wealthy clients in private villas or high-end spas.
The one thing AI can't do
You know exactly which knot to press to make them sigh in honest relief.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Sensors map muscle density to build a perfect pressure profile.
Month 4
Integrated sprayers apply warm oil with perfect thermal consistency.
Month 14
Soft silicon grippers replicate the human palm for deep tissue.
Year 2.4
AI mimics your listening silence without ever needing an opinion.
Year 4 · D-Day
Your massage table now moves on its own and requires no breaks.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.8%
60 minutes
Average session duration
99 percent
Oil viscosity sensitivity
High load
Human emotional baggage
Your severance
A one-way ticket to a non-luxury destination.
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