Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Investor Engagement Researcher jobs? · Latest report #ck3qr5xb
Your job has an expiration date
November 6, 2027
In 13 monthsTurning your deep-dive research into a singular, automated PDF export loop.
Professional stalker for high-net-worth individuals and VCs.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated relationship management, zero human sentiment.
split.you▸ CAPTABLE-BOT V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 13 MONTHSAI's Special Power
harvests institutional contacts from your own memory
Scouring LinkedIn and SEC filings for leads while crafting personalized email sequences for institutional investors. You turn data into sales pipelines.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still detect a subtle lack of enthusiasm in a VC's reply.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Your CRM connects directly to our LLM to ingest all historical investor interaction data.
Month 3
The engine begins sending hyper-personalized emails based on real-time news triggers and funding cycles.
Month 6
Our vision models read investor replies and prioritize leads by measuring actual reply intent.
Month 9
The machine automatically schedules meetings into your calendar without asking for your approval.
Month 13 · D-Day
We remove your login credentials, leaving only a perfectly optimized, silent investor pipeline.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.6%
400,000/sec
Cold emails sent
100 percent
Human error rate
99.9 percent
Sentiment analysis accuracy
Your severance
A LinkedIn premium subscription for one fiscal quarter.
Discussion
