Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Investor Services Analyst jobs? · Latest report #utjg2kkk
Your job has an expiration date
May 24, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour spreadsheets are just ghosts waiting to be deleted by better code.
Professional spreadsheet jockey in the Windy City.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Capital flows, zero human errors.
oof.youAI▸ CAPTABLE-BOT X1▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
reconciles entire fund portfolios every microsecond
You track investor capital calls, distributions, and fund subscriptions. You manually update fund data daily.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still awkwardly explain to a panicked billionaire why their money hasn't cleared yet.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
API connectors replace your manual bank statement imports.
Month 5
Matching logic runs faster than your eyes can scan rows.
Month 10
Templates generate all legal notices without human input.
Month 15
Algorithms handle KYC checks faster than any intern.
Month 19 · D-Day
The spreadsheet is deleted and the server takes full control.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97%
98 percent reduction
Manual Data Entry
instantaneous
Capital Call Speed
zeroed out
Human Error Rate
Your severance
One free subscription to a premium stock market simulator.
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