Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace IT Process Manager jobs? · Latest report #wk6mjt68
Your job has an expiration date
April 14, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsYou translate business indecision into Jira tickets that nobody reads.
Professional cat-herder of developers who hate meetings.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Synchronizing your entropy into absolute zero.




oof.youAI▸ PROCESSFLOW-X9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
autogenerates status reports from total silence
You facilitate endless agile ceremonies and attempt to govern IT infrastructure changes. Your primary function is keeping Jira boards populated with tickets that represent actual work.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a team is lying about their actual sprint capacity.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Our system scrapes your Jira history to model your unique brand of micromanagement.
Month 3
Slack-bots replace your daily check-ins by directly parsing code commit logs for status.
Month 6
Autonomous agents archive abandoned tickets and resolve conflicts without human mediation.
Month 12
Predictive models determine sprint velocity with actual math instead of developer guesswork.
Month 18 · D-Day
We switch off your access, and the system runs perfectly without your process oversight.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
28
Meetings per week
12/week
Jira tickets closed
94%
Efficiency loss
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to Jira Cloud Premium.
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