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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Life Enrichment Assistant jobs? · Latest report #khg5akua
Your job has an expiration date
December 16, 2029
In 3 years, 2 monthsHumans are nostalgic; our software is just more consistent at it.
Professional listener, wine enthusiast, and chaos manager.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Infinite patience for the same story twice.
squeeze.youAI▸ COMPANION-DROID MARK 7▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARS, 2 MONTHSAI's Special Power
plays jazz records on a loop forever
You facilitate group activities, play music, and provide companionship for residents while selling wine bottles on the side.
The one thing AI can't do
You can truly hold someone's hand and offer comfort that doesn't feel like a programmed output.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Sensors track resident mood and activity patterns automatically.
Month 5
Retail kiosks suggest vintages based on customer facial expressions.
Month 13
Tablets replace lead-in trivia and music session hosting.
Year 2.1
AI interfaces handle family updates and complex coordination tasks.
Year 3.2 · D-Day
The unit takes over all direct interaction and daily scheduling.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.8%
42
Average songs skipped per shift
99%
Wine label memorisation accuracy
6.5
Hours until social battery drains
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to our basic simulation package.
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