Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Loyalty App Co-Founder jobs? · Latest report #x6nmhh2n
Your job has an expiration date
May 25, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsSolving the 'loyalty' problem by making sure customers never return voluntarily.
Serial founder of products that solve imaginary problems.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated retention for markets that don't care.
wheee!you▸ CHURNMASTER 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
deletes your user base to optimize margins
You build digital punch-cards that annoy people. You pitch merchants on growth while burning your own runway.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to investors with enough charisma to get a follow-on meeting.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Bots scrape cafe registries to email pitches nobody will ever read.
Month 5
App builders replace your design team with drag-and-drop logic flows.
Month 10
AI models handle the calls and sign up merchants automatically.
Month 15
Algorithms optimize coupons so users delete the app naturally.
Month 19 · D-Day
The system runs itself and you are officially redundant.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 99.5%
88 percent
Coffee shops ghosting you
12 percent
Actual user retention
4
Pivot attempts this quarter
Your severance
One free espresso and a broken API key.
Discussion
