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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Luxury Retail Consultant jobs? · Latest report #qyr8nwrv
Your job has an expiration date
July 23, 2028
In 1 year, 9 monthsSelling overpriced leather bags to people who never use them.
Professional gatekeeper of shiny things and unearned confidence.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
The infinite salesperson who never yawns.
oof.youAI▸ OMNICLIENT-V4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 9 MONTHSAI's Special Power
projects perfect fake-sincerity via retinal displays
Managing high-net-worth client relationships and maintaining meticulous boutique inventory. Delivering curated product presentations with simulated scarcity.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to a client about a watch's prestige with genuine-looking eye contact.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 7
Algorithms analyze regional wealth data to automate luxury inventory replenishment before customers even arrive.
Month 4
Large language models provide the required condescending tone for remote client inquiries via screen interface.
Month 11
Holographic display units replace the physical need for human product walkthroughs and sales pitches.
Month 17
Vision sensors track client eye movement to detect interest, eliminating the need for human observation.
Month 21 · D-Day
The boutique is fully automated with smart-locks and silent AI presence for maximum profit efficiency.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.3%
22%
Average Up-sell Rate
99%
Client Flattery Ratio
Sub-optimal
Inventory Dusting Speed
Your severance
A complimentary polyester uniform and a branded tote bag.
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