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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace M&A Vice President jobs? · Latest report #pqarzcuf
Your job has an expiration date
May 29, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsYour expensive pitch deck is just a spreadsheet with a bow.
Professional power-pointer and professional burnout enthusiast.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Closing deals before the board finishes coffee.
glub.youAI▸ ACQUISITION-GPT V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
senses non-verbal cues from nervous ceos
You synthesize massive data sets into acquisition narratives and manage client relationships through grueling, late-night transaction cycles.
The one thing AI can't do
You can read the room's subtle tension during a deadlocked closing negotiation.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Sensors organize and index your messy data rooms automatically.
Month 5
Algorithms replace your manual cap table and synergy models.
Month 13
Generative models produce pitch decks without the version control headache.
Month 20
AI negotiators handle the back-and-forth on deal terms.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
The machine fully manages the entire deal flow.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.7%
85
Average weekly hours
42
Pitch deck versions
Excessive
Coffee consumption
Your severance
A LinkedIn recommendation and one very expensive suit.
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