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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Machine Learning Research Student jobs? · Latest report #67uwncma
Your job has an expiration date
December 16, 2027
In 14 monthsTraining models to replace yourself is the ultimate career self-own.
Aspiring quant with too many buzzwords in bio.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Stochastic gradient descent, now without the whining.
ow.youAI▸ OMNIMODEL OPTIMIZER V4.2▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
autogenerates hyperparameter sweeps while you sleep
You spend your days optimizing CUDA kernels, debugging Reinforcement Learning agents, and pretending that academic weather forecasting research has commercial viability.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still explain why the model collapsed despite perfect convergence metrics.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Our agent refactors your inefficient CUDA kernels into optimal machine-generated assembly code.
Month 3
Synthetic data engines replace the manual labor of cleaning weather sensor records.
Month 6
Large language models synthesize your research papers without the need for human coffee intake.
Month 10
Adaptive algorithms train themselves on historical weather trends faster than any PhD candidate.
Month 14 · D-Day
Your account is migrated to a read-only archive while we terminate your server access.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 94.9%
Excessive
Coffee-to-Inference Ratio
Daily
Kernel Compilation Failures
Zero
Research Alignment Probability
Your severance
One free trial of a cloud-based GPU instance.
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