Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Marriage Counselor jobs? · Latest report #xwftav84
Your job has an expiration date
November 30, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthYour professional listening ear is being replaced by an infinite feedback loop.
Professional referee for people who stopped liking each other.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Neutrality guaranteed by cold, hard data.
no no noyou▸ SYNCPULSE EMPATHY-ENGINE 9▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
calculates optimal compromise using game theory
You mediate disputes and analyze relational patterns to save unions. Soon, algorithms will predict breakups with mathematical certainty.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the exact moment a partner stops listening through a micro-expression.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 6
Wearables monitor heart rate and voice tone during arguments.
Month 8
Software flags toxic communication patterns before you even start.
Month 19
AI prompts partners with scripts to de-escalate their immediate conflicts.
Year 2.6
Algorithms predict divorce probability with ninety-nine percent accuracy.
Year 4 · D-Day
The clinic closes as machines finalize all permanent separations.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.3%
50 minutes
Average session duration
42 percent
Client reconciliation rate
3 per week
Tissue box consumption
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a lonely hearts app.
Discussion
