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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Media Director jobs? · Latest report #93rwn6cv
Your job has an expiration date
July 24, 2028
In 1 year, 9 monthsYou curate expensive silence while algorithms generate actual market alpha.
Master of spin, spreadsheets, and LinkedIn thought-leadership vanity.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Truth is just data points arranged attractively.
split.youAI▸ NARRATIVE ENGINE V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 9 MONTHSAI's Special Power
projects perfect sentiment scores across all feeds
Manage firm PR, draft executive thought-leadership articles, and supervise agency output for portfolio companies. You sell narratives.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still read the room when the board decides to fire everyone.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 5
AI models ingest internal data to write quarterly investment updates.
Month 5
Smart agents replace the need for outside creative agency retainers.
Month 10
Real-time monitoring tools dictate messaging faster than human analysts.
Month 16
Neural nets mimic partner voices for every social post perfectly.
Month 21 · D-Day
The Narrative Engine handles all external communications without a human.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.6%
42 per page
Buzzword frequency per slide
1:12
Coffee-to-email ratio
100 percent
Time saved from meetings
Your severance
One free subscription to a premium stock ticker.
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