Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Medical Statistician jobs? · Latest report #pbjzcbdb
Your job has an expiration date
May 24, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour p-values are just crying for help in a spreadsheet.
Professional ghostwriter for clinical trial success stories.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Turning messy clinical data into final reports.
oof.youAI▸ TRIALSAGE V7▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
filters noisy clinical data with 99 percent accuracy
You clean clinical trial data to find patterns. You write scripts to prove if new drugs actually work.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a researcher is lying about their outlier data just by looking.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Smart models ingest raw trial data without your constant manual scrubbing.
Month 4
AI writes the R and SAS code for your baseline tables.
Month 8
Automated checkers ensure all analysis plans meet regulatory requirements.
Month 13
Generative models produce the final study documents from raw output.
Month 19 · D-Day
TrialSage runs the final study analysis in under three seconds.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.7%
4 cups daily
Coffee consumed
Chronic
P-value anxiety
Human-speed
Code efficiency
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to basic statistical software.
Discussion
