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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Medical Transporter jobs? · Latest report #dh9dfmnk
Your job has an expiration date
November 30, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthMoving bodies between rooms is a logistics problem, not a calling.
Professional corridor navigator, expert in elevator floor-jockeying.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Logistics efficiency for the dying and recovering.
splat.you▸ TRANSPORT-AIDE 9000▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
optimizes route vectors through busy hallways
Transferring patients between hospital departments via gurney and wheelchair while navigating strict safety protocols and fluctuating ward urgency. You are human furniture.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still read the subtle panic in a patient's eyes before a transfer.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 2
Centralized software begins optimizing your transit routes to remove human choice from the corridor loop.
Month 13
Self-navigating transport pods reduce the need for manual pushing in predictable hospital hallway environments.
Year 2.2
Lidar and vision arrays map every corner of the facility to prevent collision-based human error.
Year 3.2
Automated gurney lifts replace the physical strain of patient transfer during high-volume bed rotation windows.
Year 4 · D-Day
The entire fleet of autonomous transporters eliminates the need for human guidance in medical transit.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92.9%
42%
Gurney idle time
99.9%
Average stair avoidance
Instant
Protocol compliance speed
Your severance
One complimentary set of comfortable orthopaedic shoes.
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