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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Mergers and Acquisitions Consultant jobs? · Latest report #hphmhv6h
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2028
In 2 yearsYou sell companies to companies that don't know why they bought them.
Professional over-thinker of corporate marriage outcomes.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Calculates synergy so you don't have to.
oof.youAI▸ ACQUIREBOT PRO V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARSAI's Special Power
models infinite bankruptcy scenarios in seconds
You build complex financial models to justify buying firms. You draft slide decks for executives to nod at.
The one thing AI can't do
You can discern the panicked look of a CEO during a hostile takeover.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 3
Automated tools take over scanning and tagging financial documents.
Month 5
Generative models produce your pitch decks based on raw data.
Month 10
Risk assessment algorithms replace your manual Excel spreadsheet logic.
Month 18
AI agents handle routine questions between the buying firm parties.
Year 2 · D-Day
Your account is deleted as the machine signs the contract.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.6%
42 cups
Coffee consumed per deal
115
Slides in pitch deck
80 weekly
Hours spent on Zoom
Your severance
A one-month subscription to a discontinued meditation app.
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