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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace NBA Coach jobs? · Latest report #h2tmszrc
Your job has an expiration date
May 15, 2030
In 3 years, 7 monthsYour clipboard is just a fancy prop for television cameras.
Professional loud-talker and clipboard-slamming enthusiast.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect rotations, zero ego, infinite tactical depth.
no no noyouAI▸ COURTMASTER TACTICIAN PRO▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
calculates optimal defensive switch in milliseconds
You manage player rotations, call timeouts, draw up plays, and adjust schemes based on real-time game data analytics.
The one thing AI can't do
You alone can sense when a star player is emotionally ready to take the shot.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 3
Wearable sensors start feeding live biometric data to bench analysts.
Month 7
AI-generated play suggestions replace manual whiteboard doodles.
Month 16
Algorithms automatically execute player substitutions based on fatigue levels.
Year 2.3
Large language models handle all post-game clichés with zero frustration.
Year 3.6 · D-Day
The head coach role is permanently vacated for centralized tactical arrays.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92%
99.9 percent
Timeout optimization accuracy
zero
Average technical fouls
infinite
Playbook complexity potential
Your severance
One lifetime supply of complimentary courtside Gatorade.
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