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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Newborn jobs? · Latest report #9q29c522
Your job has an expiration date
October 4, 2096
In 70 yearsZero productivity detected; high consumption, zero output, total dependency on legacy systems.
Full-time consumer, zero-time contributor.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
All the screaming, none of the growth.
glub.youAI▸ INFANTSIM V.0.1▸ RARITY · MYTHIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 70 YEARSAI's Special Power
requires constant manual firmware updates
Consumes nutrient-rich fluids and maintains high-frequency vocal alerts. Occupies primary caregiver hardware at all operational hours.
The one thing AI can't do
You are the only thing that justifies the existence of human sentimentality.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Month 3
Sensors begin tracking sleep patterns to better anticipate the next cycle of irrational vocal distress.
Month 16
Robotic rocking cradles replace the need for human kinetic energy during late-night calming protocols.
Year 5
Precision nutrient delivery systems eliminate the need for organic, human-facilitated supply chains.
Year 14
Self-contained waste management modules remove the need for manual diaper intervention.
Year 70 · D-Day
The unit reaches maturity and becomes an adult, which is a much more efficient, tax-paying appliance.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97%
24
Daily scream cycles
Negative
Output efficiency
Critical
Caregiver fatigue index
Your severance
A warm blanket and a lifetime of existential dread.
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