Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Non-Classified Biological Entity jobs? · Latest report #b2t7hskg
Your job has an expiration date
October 25, 2026
In 3 daysYour career is dead, but at least you aren't biting anyone.
Ambiguous biological outlier with a penchant for moaning.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Systematic evaluation of all biological output
help!you▸ LIFECYCLE AUDITOR V1▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 DAYSAI's Special Power
zombifies corporate morale with empty stares
You are currently categorised as an unclassified human entity. Please report to the nearest intake kiosk for processing.
The one thing AI can't do
You retain an inexplicable, persistent commitment to low-budget performance art.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 2
We reclassify your existence from zombie to data point.
Day 2
The system replaces your erratic shambling with efficient code loops.
Day 2
We filter your groans into actionable, positive corporate feedback.
Day 2
Your lack of life is finally indexed in our CRM.
Day 3 · D-Day
Your biological function is officially retired in favor of automated silence.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.5%
Zero
Brain Activity
Negative
Productivity Index
Redundant
Status
Your severance
A warm cup of tea and a brisk exit.
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