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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Office Plant Waterer jobs? · Latest report #svzqnkd3
Your job has an expiration date
September 22, 2028
In 1 year, 11 monthsYou are just a mobile irrigation system with a water bill.
Office Plant Waterer (currently overwatering the spider plant)
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Irrigation that never forgets to hydrate.
toast.youAI▸ HYDROSTAT DESK SENTINEL V4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
senses soil drought before leaves wilt
You monitor moisture levels for ferns and succulents while navigating cramped office corridors and breakroom spills.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect when a coworker is actually talking to their plants for comfort.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 9
Sensors map every cubicle plant to build a watering route.
Month 6
Moisture probes are inserted into every single office pot.
Month 13
A small wheeled unit takes over the low-light zones.
Month 19
The unit learns to avoid rolling chairs and discarded lunch bags.
Year 1.9 · D-Day
The cart is fully autonomous and your watering can is recycled.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.2%
2.4
Average spills per day
12 percent
Plant fatality rate
8,000 daily
Total office steps walked
Your severance
A single plastic fern and a spray bottle.
Discussion
