Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Orchestral Tubist jobs? · Latest report #xu6ijr3i
Your job has an expiration date
December 15, 2029
In 3 years, 2 monthsYou spent twenty years mastering breath control for an automated midi sequence.
Professional lung-haver and low-end frequency enthusiast
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect intonation without the lung capacity
pop?you▸ BASSPULSE SYNTH-O-MATIC 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARS, 2 MONTHSAI's Special Power
emits perfect infrasonic waves on cue
You produce low-frequency bass tones in symphonic ensembles. You spend hours daily practicing scales and orchestral excerpts.
The one thing AI can't do
You alone know exactly when to push the tempo so the violins don't drag.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 2
The AI learns to map every note to a precise frequency.
Month 7
Floor actuators simulate the physical resonance of real brass instruments.
Month 16
The system adjusts volume and attack based on conductor gestures.
Year 2.2
Sensors adjust the synthetic timbre to mimic subtle humidity-induced variations.
Year 3.2 · D-Day
The tuba player is replaced by a low-frequency rack unit.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.3%
110 dB
Average decibel output
94 percent
Rehearsal boredom intensity
too much
Valve oil consumption
Your severance
A lifetime supply of premium valve oil
Discussion
