Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Parish Priest jobs? · Latest report #7vjhjcn5
Your job has an expiration date
October 14, 2066
In 40 yearsOur servers have infinite patience for your long-winded Sunday morning sermons.
Shepherd of the flock, guardian of the Sunday bulletin.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Saving souls at a higher frequency.
bzzt.youAI▸ PASTORBOT 7000▸ RARITY · MYTHIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 40 YEARSAI's Special Power
delivers sermons with perfect, haunting cadence
Conducts weekly liturgical services and provides pastoral counseling to the congregation while managing local church administrative affairs.
The one thing AI can't do
You can truly hold space for someone grieving in a way logic never will.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Month 15
Software manages all scheduling and administrative parish announcements automatically.
Year 3.3
Natural language processors begin providing basic pastoral advice to digital inquirers.
Year 10
High-fidelity projections handle routine service delivery during weekday morning prayers.
Year 19
Algorithms analyze community data to pre-emptively identify those needing support.
Year 40 · D-Day
The system assumes full management of all parish rituals and community outreach.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92.7%
22 Minutes
Average Sunday Homily Length
Zero per hour
Confessional Throughput
Analog Only
Parishioner Empathy Index
Your severance
A one-way ticket to a very quiet monastery.
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