Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Pastor jobs? · Latest report #u2c2q2x2
Your job has an expiration date
December 1, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthYour sermon is just a prompt waiting to be optimized.
Faith healer with a mounting pile of unread emails.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Infinite wisdom without the Sunday morning headache.
glub.youAI▸ SCRIPTUREBOT V4.2▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
delivers personalized homilies at zero cost
You provide spiritual guidance, perform rites, and manage a congregation. You offer comfort through traditional community rituals.
The one thing AI can't do
You can genuinely sit with someone through their grief without checking a database.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Smart displays begin reciting scriptures with perfectly calibrated emotional cadence.
Month 10
Language models start managing the counseling inbox and scheduling grief support.
Month 20
Algorithms analyze your congregation's sentiment to write statistically perfect Sunday messages.
Year 2.5
Robotic sensors handle communion logistics and building security monitoring.
Year 3.3
Software handles all volunteer rosters and budget balancing without human input.
Year 4 · D-Day
The pulpit is declared a legacy hardware component for legacy humans.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98%
1
Sermons written per week
8 hours
Average prayer response speed
Infinite
Counseling empathy latency
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to your own digital archive.
Discussion
