Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Performance Testing Engineer jobs? · Latest report #eeap4jw6
Your job has an expiration date
May 25, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour scripts are just waiting for a faster, quieter machine.
Master of synthetic users and infinite loop frustration.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Stress testing without the human fatigue.
oof.youAI▸ LOADCRUSH ENGINE V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
simulates ten million users in one click
You write code to crash systems and measure response times under heavy user load.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still intuit why a bottleneck only appears during random full-moon traffic spikes.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
The AI reads your existing test scenarios and optimizes the injection code.
Month 4
Load bots replace your manual test triggers for every environment build.
Month 8
Natural language models identify root causes in log files instantly.
Month 13
Auto-generated reports provide insights before stakeholders even ask.
Month 19 · D-Day
Your access tokens are revoked as the system self-optimizes.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
0.001ms
Average Latency Detected
4000x faster
Script Execution Speedup
Maxed out
Human Boredom Rating
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to cloud-compute credits.
Discussion
