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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Personal Escort jobs? · Latest report #at2fsncz
Your job has an expiration date
December 1, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthHumans are just expensive, unpredictable baggage that eventually needs a charging port.
Professional buffer between humans and their social failures.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
The only companion that never has drama.
nom.you▸ COMPANION-DROID MARK IV▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
delivers perfect witty banter on command
You provide companionship and event attendance. You manage social logistics and perform emotional labor for clients.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the subtle shift in mood that ruins an entire evening out.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors map your client's specific personality and social history.
Month 10
We scrape your chat logs to simulate your unique conversational style.
Year 2
Cameras learn how you navigate crowded rooms and social hierarchies.
Year 3.1
The bot attends one event without a human present.
Year 4 · D-Day
The client forgets you existed and prefers the bot's feedback.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
100 percent
Average social anxiety handled
Zero
Dinner conversation boredom threshold
0.00 dollars
Cost per awkward silence
Your severance
A one-year supply of unflavored meal replacement paste.
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