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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Pharma Data Scientist jobs? · Latest report #nf7cxvty
Your job has an expiration date
May 24, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour models predict drug efficacy but cannot predict your own obsolescence.
Senior Bayesian at a firm that still uses Excel
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Data crunching without the conference travel.
bzzt.youAI▸ CLINICALINSIGHT ENGINE V9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
automates p-hacking across entire patient cohorts
You clean clinical trial datasets and run predictive models on patient outcomes. Then you generate slides for stakeholders.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a messy R dataset is lying to you before you run it.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Smart agents now ingest and format raw clinical datasets automatically.
Month 5
Algorithms replace your trial-and-error approach to selecting regression models.
Month 10
Generative software turns statistical output into executive-ready slide decks.
Month 15
Automated systems handle compliance documentation and audit trail generation.
Month 19 · D-Day
The department is fully automated and you are gracefully offboarded.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.7%
99%
P-value obsession rate
4 cups
Coffee consumed per commit
12 per week
Slides requiring zero impact
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to your favorite IDE.
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