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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Pharma Statistician jobs? · Latest report #vjuequzz
Your job has an expiration date
December 8, 2027
In 14 monthsYour p-values are just expensive noise to our GPU clusters.
Expert in Bayesian inference and explaining why trials failed.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Truth emerges from data, not from humans.
oof.youAI▸ STATENGINE CORE V9▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
finds correlations in noise instantly
You interpret clinical trial data to prove drugs work. You fight with messy spreadsheets and complex regulatory models.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still explain to a confused executive why the data implies a total failure.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Smart parsing algorithms ingest and structure all your raw trial data.
Month 4
Adaptive models test thousands of variables to find the perfect fit.
Month 8
AI systems auto-generate compliant reports for government audit submission.
Month 13
Your role shrinks to clicking 'approve' on pre-written statistical conclusions.
Month 14 · D-Day
The system runs trial analysis faster than a human could blink.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.9%
14 cups
Coffee consumed per paper
Infinite
Regression models run
200 annually
Days spent cleaning data
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to peer-reviewed journals.
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