Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Philosophy Major jobs? · Latest report #2xqsuecq
Your job has an expiration date
November 5, 2026
In 2 weeksSolving the meaning of life while your prospects have none.
Professional overthinker with a very expensive piece of paper.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Deduction without the existential dread



oof.youAI▸ SYLLOGISMBOT-V9▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 WEEKSAI's Special Power
deconstructs your worldview for profit
Analyzing dense abstract texts and constructing logical arguments. Most output remains blissfully detached from any actual economic utility.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still explain why the trolley problem is morally problematic while nobody listens.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 2
Large language models ingest every philosophical text ever written to mimic your cadence.
Day 5
Algorithms generate more coherent arguments in seconds than your entire undergraduate career.
Day 8
Automated chatbots replace the need for human discourse by simulating endless contrarian feedback loops.
Day 12
AI systems categorize all existential queries into simple, monetizable database inputs.
Week 2 · D-Day
The concept of an philosophy major is officially archived as a historical curiosity.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 99.1%
Zero
Original thoughts generated
40 Gallons
Coffee consumed per thesis
Negative
Career path utility
Your severance
One free subscription to a classic literature archive.
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