Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Pogo Stick Specialist jobs? · Latest report #rg3qykaa
Your job has an expiration date
August 25, 2030
In 3 years, 10 monthsGravity is doing most of the work anyway, let the machine finish.
Professional verticality expert (airborne enthusiast, gravity skeptic).
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
The only spring you will ever need.
split.you▸ JUMPBOT PRO 9000▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARS, 10 MONTHSAI's Special Power
executes perfect 10-foot vertical maneuvers endlessly
You master rhythmic bouncing, handle extreme balance, and perform high-altitude aerial tricks for crowds.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still recover from a disastrous landing without triggering a hardware recall.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors measure your exact bounce force and rhythmic timing patterns.
Month 10
Piston-driven feet start adjusting your center of mass automatically.
Month 20
An AI model predicts the optimal trajectory for every jump.
Year 2.5
Hardware controllers maintain the perfect beat for crowd interaction.
Year 3.8 · D-Day
The machine takes the stick permanently and never gets tired.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92.9%
240 sustained
bounces per minute
500 lbs
average impact force
too low
crowd engagement score
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a local orthopedic clinic.
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