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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Poison Tester jobs? · Latest report #ewvqqwje
Your job has an expiration date
November 30, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthTasting your own mortality is a poor substitute for cloud computing.
Professional martyr with a high threshold for chemical pain.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Dying in your place since 2028
shred.you▸ TOXSCAN ANALYTICAL V4▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
filters toxic compounds through synthetic membranes
You sample chemical compounds to detect toxicity via sensory degradation or physiological response. Your job is basically a slow-motion suicide pact with corporate liability waivers.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess an intuitive, terrifying grasp of exactly how quickly a dose acts.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 11
Sensors begin recording your physiological data to train the model's tolerance baseline.
Month 10
Robot arms handle the dilution and titration processes to reduce your primary exposure.
Year 2.2
Chemical vapor sensors replace your sense of smell with real-time molecular data streams.
Year 3.2
The machine consumes the samples while you watch a screen for safety confirmation alerts.
Year 4 · D-Day
Your desk is repurposed as a storage unit for hazardous waste containment.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 93.8%
99.999%
Toxin detection accuracy
Regrettable
Human lethality rate
Indefinite
Replacement lifespan
Your severance
A full medical pension and a very nice tombstone.
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