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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Pole Dance Performer jobs? · Latest report #gq33nnyq
Your job has an expiration date
November 30, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthGravity is eventually just a set of variables for us to solve.
Professional gravity-defier and kinetic floor-work expert.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect centrifugal motion every time.
glub.youAI▸ GYROSPIN 9000▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
executes impossible rotational inertia at peak speed
Executes complex acrobatic maneuvers, maintains immense physical grip strength, and performs rhythmic choreography on vertical apparatus.
The one thing AI can't do
You retain the unique ability to improvise fluidly in response to the room's energy.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 13
Sensors map your exact kinetic signature and muscle engagement patterns during every standard movement.
Month 9
Robotic poles are fitted with adaptive grip surfaces that simulate real-time friction adjustments automatically.
Month 21
High-torque motors now power pole rotation to achieve speeds no organic muscle could safely sustain.
Year 2.9
Algorithms calculate the most aesthetically pleasing sequence of transitions based on real-time spatial analytics.
Year 4 · D-Day
The GyroSpin 9000 performs the entire repertoire flawlessly without requiring breath or breaks.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 94.2%
2000
Grip strength psi
400 RPM
Rotational velocity
4 mins
Human stamina limit
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to high-friction gym chalk.
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