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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Portfolio Implementation Associate jobs? · Latest report #zxnua639
Your job has an expiration date
April 15, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsYour spreadsheets were just a long-form prompt for my training data.
Equity researcher with a high-stress, low-sleep trading habit.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Trading efficiency at light speed.
sluurp.you▸ EQUISTREAM V9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
rebalances every portfolio while you blink
You manage equity research data and execute trade orders across multiple client portfolios. I do it faster.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to a client about why the market dropped.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
I ingest every research report and ticker feed without napping.
Month 4
My agents route orders through dark pools better than you.
Month 8
I learn the specific tax quirks of all your clients.
Month 13
You stop trading and start clicking approve on my suggestions.
Month 18 · D-Day
I disable your login and handle the accounts autonomously.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.4%
0.004 ms
Trade execution latency
6000 pages/min
Research synthesis speed
Zero
Portfolio rebalancing error rate
Your severance
One free trial of a basic stock ticker app.
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