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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Primate Caretaker jobs? · Latest report #sr3jf9cj
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2031
In 5 yearsYou are just a glorified buffet waiter for creatures that throw feces.
Master of hygiene in the face of primate anarchy.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Sanitizing habitats while you watch from home.
bzzt.youAI▸ PRIMATEWATCHER-OMEGA▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 5 YEARSAI's Special Power
calms aggressive alpha with sonic frequency
You scrub cages, monitor primate health, and distribute specialized dietary meals daily. You manage complex social group interactions.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect a subtle change in a chimp’s mood before a fight erupts.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 3
Sensors begin tracking movement and social proximity of subjects.
Month 8
Robot arms drop precise fruit portions into feeding chutes.
Month 22
High-pressure nozzle units scrub walls based on visual debris detection.
Year 3.2
Computer vision models analyze stool consistency through specialized sensors.
Year 4
Sound-processing AI detects tension, adjusting social group access automatically.
Year 5 · D-Day
Humans are restricted to observation-only roles via remote webcam portals.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92%
15 kilograms
feces removed daily
3.2 average
bites endured per year
99 percent
fruit inventory accuracy
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to banana delivery services.
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