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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Principal Percussionist jobs? · Latest report #uwd4txbd
Your job has an expiration date
October 27, 2029
In 3 yearsKeeping time is a math problem that requires no soul, only sensors.
Master of triangles, timpanis, and very long silences.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect rhythm without the excessive equipment hauling.
bzzt.you▸ TEMPOMASTER 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARSAI's Special Power
triggers perfect orchestral timing on cue
You spend hours mastering complex orchestral mallet work and rhythmic precision. You wait in the back for cues.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still sense the exact moment the conductor is about to panic.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors map the concert hall acoustics to calibrate strike force.
Month 5
AI parses every complex percussion part into precise motor instructions.
Month 13
Robotic arms learn to mimic the exact bounce of felt mallets.
Year 2.1
Vision systems lock onto the conductor's baton for real-time tempo.
Year 3 · D-Day
The orchestra plays in perfect silence as the robot takes over.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.9%
78 percent
Time spent counting rests
too slow
Average mallet change speed
0.001 ms
Vibrato accuracy deviation
Your severance
One digital metronome and a lifetime supply of earplugs.
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