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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Private Equity Analyst jobs? · Latest report #ktf93dk9
Your job has an expiration date
April 15, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsYour financial modeling skill is just a very slow Excel macro.
Master of Excel shortcuts and weekend-killer spreadsheets.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Superior deal flow without the 90-hour week.
split.youAI▸ CAPITAI-MODELER 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
runs valuation scenarios while you sleep
You build complex financial models and sift through company data for acquisition targets. We do this in seconds.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a client is lying to you over a lukewarm lunch.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 3
Our software scrapes the virtual data room automatically for you.
Month 4
The LBO model builds itself with verified market benchmarks.
Month 9
Our layout engine handles pitch deck alignment and fonts instantly.
Month 12
The AI handles all routine communication with investment banks.
Month 18 · D-Day
The machine takes the final vote on the acquisition target.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.3%
40 cups
Coffee consumed per deal
12 errors
Excel errors per model
95%
Weekend hours lost
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to your favorite caffeine brand.
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